Please note: This story contains shounen ai / yaoi. Please only read if you like it.

Black clouds were gathering, darkening the faint moonlight. Sasori lifted his head and looked up to the sky when he heard the first thunder. A storm was coming up, not far away from here. A smile appeared on the shinobi’s face when he saw the first raindrops fall. He loved storms. He hadn’t seen many rainstorms in his life, only sandstorms.

Sasori had been on his way home when the storm had started to approach. Not to his home village, though, but on his way back to his hideout, a small cottage hidden in the woods. He had left the sand village and moved here a while ago. He had no idea if he wanted to go back one day. At the moment, he enjoyed living here.

A lightning flashed across the sky, followed by rumbling thunder, causing Sasori to twitch. Fortunately, he had made it to his hideout in time before the rain started to pour. He liked to watch storms, but he wasn’t keen on being outside in heavy weather. It could be rather dangerous to walk around in the woods during a storm like this, actually. He had seen branches break in the wind and fall down, and he really didn’t want to be hit by one of them.

Sasori put the kettle on and sat down next to the window. It was almost completely dark now and no one could be seen outside, even all the animals living in the woods had disappeared. All of them, except one stupid bird that kept flying circles high above the trees.

“Come down and hide before you get struck by lightning”, Sasori mumbled. He didn’t mind to kill people during a mission, but for some strange reason he didn’t want animals to be killed, especially if they were as beautiful and majestic as that bird up there.

The red head got up to see if his tea was ready. The hot liquid was steaming in the cup, still too hot to drink, but Sasori couldn’t help to take a small sip. He cursed himself when he burnt his tongue, but it tasted good. Ginger, his favorite flavor. Sasori loved tea, especially after coming back from a mission, when he was on his own again. It reminded him of his parents. As a child, he had used to snuggle up to one of them with a cup of tea in his hand whenever they had come back from a mission, and they had told him what had happened to them during their absence. He had felt so good back then, curious and excited about their stories, but all warm and comfortable at the same time.

When Sasori looked out of the window again, he heaved a sigh of relief. The bird had disappeared. At least the animals living here were clever enough not to get killed. The red head smirked when he remembered the face of the shinobi he had just met. Those eyes, widened with fear, those desperate whispers slipping out of his mouth, begging him to spare his life. He would have been able to run away, but he had been frozen by Sasori’s steady gaze, his legs trembling with fear. Too bad for him. Sasori hadn’t intended to kill him at first, but if he was too stupid to retreat when he had the chance to, it couldn’t be helped…

Suddenly, Sasori’s heart skipped a beat, and he almost spit his tea all over the table. That bird… It was way too big to hide somewhere in the woods. Maybe it hadn’t landed on purpose, but had fallen down from the sky. It hadn’t looked like an owl or another nocturnal bird, but like a… Yes, if he remembered correctly, like a kind of eagle.

An eagle, in the woods, fallen down from the sky?
Oh no. That moron.

Sasori jumped to his feet, dropping his cup and spilling the hot tea all over the carpet. Cold air hit his skin when he opened the door with a jerk and he ran outside, his vibrant red hair flowing in the wind.


“Sasori-danna, un”, a soft voice asked.
Two big blue eyes were gazing at Sasori, slightly covered by blond strands, giving him a pleading look.
“Don’t be mad at me”, the blond asked again, his voice almost a whisper.
“I’m not mad at you, Deidara”, Sasori huffed, “I’m disappointed in you.”
He couldn’t believe the boy had messed up one of their missions again. They had been ordered to infiltrate a foreign village secretly. Secretly. That meant, in silence, without being noticed, without making a fuss. He had repeated that about a hundred times, but apparently Deidara hadn’t been listening to him at all. As soon as they had reached the village, he would throw one of his explosives, as if he had intended to alarm every single guard before Sasori and he had even the chance to enter. Therefore, retreat was the only possibility left.

Deidara cast down his eyes.
“I didn’t mean to disappoint you, Sasori-danna, un.”
“Then why don’t you do as you’re told, for God’s sake?”, Sasori yelled and slammed his hand down on the table, causing his blond counterpart to twitch.
They were sitting in a teahouse, not far away from the village they had tried to sneak into the night before. They weren’t supposed to attack it, their mission was only to get some information. It wasn’t difficult at all as long as they moved secretly. The village was rather small and not very well protected, but a few powerful shinobi lived there, and as soon as they found out that Sasori and his partner were enemies, things could get dangerous, especially for Deidara, who wasn’t too experienced in battle yet. He was still young and new to the Akatsuki and had been sent on missions just for a few months. Furthermore, he was a long-range battle type shinobi and not very resistive when it came to physical attacks. Sasori had been teamed up with him just a few weeks ago and had found out his weaknesses pretty quickly. The boy had potential, though. He really didn’t want to lose him on such a simple mission.

“I’m sorry, Sasori-danna, un.”
The red head froze when he saw a silent tear run down Deidara’s cheek. He hadn’t meant to hurt him. The blond was so likable, after all. He was a cheerful person, always smiling and talking his head off most of the time, which was annoying sometimes, but also very refreshing. Sasori had been alone all his life, so it felt good to have someone at his side, someone happy and playful, someone who made him laugh.
“I’ll make up for it, un”, the blond sobbed, “I promise I’ll do my best tonight. Just forgive me, danna, un.”
“You’re not coming with me tonight.”
Deidara lifted his head and gave him a quizzical look.
“What do you mean, danna, un?"
“I’ll complete the mission on my own”, Sasori explained, “you stay here.”
The blue eyes were cast down once again, more tears running down from them now.

Sasori felt a tight knot build up in his chest.
“It’s not that I don’t trust you anymore”, he said and stretched out his hand, gently wiping away Deidara’s tears, “I just don’t want you to get hurt.”
The blond gazed at him, as if he had spoken in a foreign language.
“You… what?”, he stumbled, confused by Sasori’s gentle words and touch, his voice still no more than a whisper.
“I don’t want you to get hurt”, the red head repeated, “You mean so much to me, I couldn’t bear it if anything happened to you.”
Sasori was surprised by his own words. He had never thought he would say something like this out loud, especially if other people were around. But right now, he didn’t care. He just wanted his partner to stop crying. His hands started to stroke Deidara’s cheek, and the blond closed his eyes, shivering under his touch.
“Danna…”, he sighed as a faint smile appeared on his face again, “I always thought you don’t like me, un.”


Sasori’s eyes were scanning the area hectically, desperately trying to make out a shock of blond hair in the dark. He had to take care not to slip and fall. The ground was flooded and muddy, and rain was still pouring. Whenever a lightning flashed across the sky, the red head tried to catch sight of Deidara somewhere, but all he could see were trees, bushes, stones. If he had only paid more attention where the bird had come down…

Cutting wind was tearing at his coat, almost keeping him from moving forward. The red head used his scorpion tail to get rid of anything that blocked his sight, thrashing it angrily against trees, smashing stones into bits. The rain was washing away any scent, making it impossible for Sasori to locate his partner. He felt like choking with rage and fear. In his mind’s eye, he could see Deidara lying on the ground, his blue eyes empty and dull, his body torn apart, bloody, motionless. Tears started to well up in the puppeteer’s eyes. He would never forgive himself if the blond was really dead. If only he hadn’t left him behind…


“You’re leaving me, danna?”, Deidara yelled with cracking voice, “After all you told me, you’re leaving me?”
Tears were running down his cheeks, his eyes widened with fear and pain. He wrapped his arms around Sasori tightly.
“Please don’t go”, he sobbed, “I’ll break if you leave me.”
“I’ll break you if you don’t let go”, the red head shouted at the boy who was clinging to him, even though he didn’t know why. He wanted to return his hug, more than anything else, but he couldn’t. Why? Why wasn’t he able to show how much he liked Deidara? Why couldn’t he bear his warm hands on his body? Was it because he couldn’t believe someone liked him, adored him, needed him? Had he been alone for too long?

Instead of his arms he wrapped his scorpion tail around Deidara and lifted him into the air. The blond squealed when the cold metal touched his body, but didn’t try to break free. Sasori could have killed him easily. Could have crushed the light frame by just tightening his grip a bit more. Could have pushed his poisonous sting into the soft white flesh. Or could have slammed him down to the ground, breaking his bones at once. Deidara knew what he was capable of, but still didn’t defend himself. He just stared at Sasori with his beautiful blue eyes full of sadness and despair.

The red head had no idea why he acted like this. One night before, he had been afraid Deidara could be hurt during their mission, but now he was close to killing him himself. What was it that made him feel all confused and agitated? Why did he pretend to hate him, when he actually liked him so much? Why did he feel the urge to run away from him when all he wanted was to be around him?
The red head put his partner down to the ground, quickly but gently.
“Don’t you dare to follow me”, he said and turned around, “I’ll kill you if you do.”
And still not knowing why, he left without looking back.


It was hopeless. Sasori would never find Deidara out here, in pitch-black night, with rain and tears blurring his vision. The red head leaned back, panting heavily with exhaustion, trying to get hold of the tree behind him. He had been running all the time, using a huge amount of his chakra to control Hiruko in order to look for his partner, but all in vain. If only…
Sasori was startled out of his thoughts when he noticed that he hadn’t grabbed the rough bark of a tree, but something soft and muddy instead. He didn’t dare to breathe when he turned around and found that his assumption had been right. He had leaned against a clay sculpture, the eagle he had seen before, which was slowly being melted by the pouring rain. And under one of its wings, there he was, sitting on the dirty ground, curled up in a ball and shaking with cold, his face buried in his hands, his wet blond hair sticking to his face.

“Thank God, you’re alive!”
Two cerulean eyes met Sasori’s, dull and empty, as they had been in his imagination. The red head froze at the sight.
“Are you hurt, Deidara-chan?”, he gasped, voice trembling with fear.
He couldn’t tell if the face of the blond was wet with rain or tears or blood. Deidara didn’t reply but buried his face in his hands again, as if unable to return the look. Sasori bent down to him and grabbed his shoulders, slightly shaking the trembling figure. His heart was racing, on the one hand because he was glad that he had finally found his partner, on the other hand because he was afraid something could be wrong with him.
“Answer me, Deidara”, he yelled, “you hurt?”

A choking sound escaped the throat of the blond, a mumble between sobs, muffled by his arms which he had wrapped around himself. Sasori couldn’t tell if it had been a yes or a no or any reply at all, but he could tell that Deidara was exhausted, so he picked him up bridal style and pressed him tightly against Hiruko’s chest. He never moved without his guarding shell in the open, he only felt comfortable inside of it, but right now he wished he could feel Deidara’s arms wrap around his own neck instead of the puppet’s.


The eyes of the blond were closed shut when he was laid down onto the bed. He had passed out during their way back, his light frame getting limp and motionless in Sasori’s arms. The red head now frantically checked his partner’s body, but apart from a few minor injuries, he was unharmed.
“Thank God”, Sasori mumbled to himself and breathed a sigh of relief.
He got out of Hiruko and quickly sealed his puppet into a scroll. He wanted to see Deidara with his own eyes, feel his breath on his own skin, touch him with his own hands. He brushed some of the blond strands out of the boy’s face, playfully twirling the soft hair between his fingers before they made their way down, gently stroking his cheek once again. Deidara was so beautiful. Sasori couldn’t understand why he had wanted to run away from him before. All he wanted now was to be near him, to hold him in his arms, to hug him tightly against his chest.

Finally, Deidara budged, his eyes slowly fluttering open. It obviously took him a few seconds to realize that he was lying on a bed, under some woolen blankets.
“Sasori-danna”, he smiled when he became aware of the red head bending down to him, “you’ve finally come for me.”
The puppeteer could barely withstand the steady gaze of the deep blue eyes. They weren’t empty anymore.
“You look different, danna, un”, the blond said.
Of course. He hadn’t seen him before, only Hiruko. Sasori never showed his face to anyone, not even to the other Akatsuki members. He had been betrayed so often in his life he had decided not to reveal his identity to others anymore. But with Deidara, things were different.

The blond was still smiling at him, his eyes full of admiration.
“You’re beautiful, Sasori-danna, un”, he said, voice almost a whisper. The red head’s heart had been racing all the time, but now it started to beat even faster, almost painfully pounding against his chest. Their faces were so close now Sasori could barely stand the tension any longer. He had never felt that nervous before. With his eyes closed, he slowly bent down to the blond, planting a shy kiss on his lips. He could feel Deidara’s arms wrap around his neck immediately, the touch sending an anxious shiver down his spine. His counterpart apparently appreciated what he was doing, so Sasori deepened the kiss, gently forcing his tongue into his partner’s mouth. He moved closer to him, supporting his weight with his arms in order not to crush the small blond beneath him. The world seemed to stand still. The movements of their tongues, slowly exploring each other’s mouth, were so gentle, so careful, yet a bit fearful the other one would pull away the next moment.

“You don’t hate me, do you, Sasori-danna, un?”, Deidara asked when they had broken away from each other, a faint smile on his face.
The puppeteer only shook his head, unable to speak, overwhelmed with emotions. He hated the fact that he had given the little blond the impression he wasn’t liked. A sparkling tear ran down Deidara’s cheek, but it seemed to be a happy tear, as the smile was still on his face. He pulled the puppeteer closer, tightening the grip around his neck.
“Sasori-danna, un”, he whispered into his ear, “I love you.”
Sasori froze, but then a comfortable warmth started to spread throughout his body, making him feel all dizzy inside.
“I love you, too, Deidara-chan”, he said, wondering about how easily the words could be spoken when there was no doubt about them.

Why had he been that cold before? Why had he been unable to express his feelings towards the blond? Had he been too blind to see that Deidara was in love with him? No, he had known it. He had known it for long, but he hadn’t believed it. People had always been interested in his skills, his techniques, his puppets, but it was the first time someone was interested in him. He had almost forgotten what it felt like to be loved.


“Do you want some tea?”, Sasori asked out of the blue. They had been lying on the bed for a while, not talking, just watching each other.
“I’d love to”, Deidara replied, “I’m a bit cold, un.”
Sasori got up and put the kettle on once again, with the blond following him into the kitchen and wrapping his arms around him from behind, looking around curiously.
“Now I see why you didn’t want me to come with you, un”, he said, nestling his head onto his partner’s shoulder and watching him arrange two cups on a serving plate. The red head turned his head in surprise.
“You do?”
He himself didn’t know why, how could Deidara know the reason for his stupid behavior?
“Yeah”, he chuckled, causing Sasori to smirk. The puppeteer could tell from his voice that something funny was likely to be heard from the blond. He was never in a bad mood for long, and he was always being silly, even if things were serious.
“Because your place is a mess”, Deidara continued, pointing at the red stain on the carpet.
“Baka”, Sasori laughed. He was a very tidy person. He loved to arrange his furniture at right angles, and everything was always in its right place, apart from some books on the table and some puppets in need of repair on his workbench. The cup on the carpet was the only messy thing.
“I dropped that because of you”, Sasori said.
“Me?”, Deidara asked and blinked.
“Yes, when I saw your bird come down”, the red head explained while pouring hot water into the cups. Suddenly, he turned around and looked straight into Deidara’s eyes.
“Please, don’t do something like this ever again.”

Sasori’s voice had become oddly serious.
“I already told you, I couldn’t bear it if something happened to you”, he whispered, “especially if something happened to you because of me.”
Deidara cast down his eyes again. “I’m sorry, danna”, he said, “I promise I’ll never endanger myself again…”
Two blue eyes were giving Sasori a pleading look.
“But you have to promise something, too, un.”
The puppeteer could feel Deidara’s grip tighten around his waist as he continued.
“Please promise that you never leave me again.”
“Oh, Deidara-chan…”
Sasori tilted his partner’s head up, pulling him into a passionate but gentle kiss once again before he answered.
“You are the most precious thing in my life. I will never leave you, and I will never let you go. I promise.”